Breaths deep and slow

Muscles lose knots of tension

Heart’s a revved up engine

In this solitary quest for calm

Amid tempestuous times

Peace-loving souls must rest

Against all odds

If they are to last

Until the last stretch.

Just like my life now. Different priorities and opportunities. Just hoping everything will turn out well for me in the end.

Lately, I’ve had two dreams.

Last week:  Trying to get off an airplane about to crash and burn.  I wonder how I managed to escape…

Last night:  Taking a train to HongKong, wondering why I left my Hon, and clicking the shutter button of my camera without an image being developed.   This was a dream that was sooo real.  Upon waking up, I instantly figured that the strange train bound to HK doesn’t exist, that I have plans of going there with my Hon but it’s impossible that I wouldn’t tag her along with me, and my camera had charged battery but why wouldn’t it work..

One in black and white, the other in vivid colors.  Don’t know what’s with color and dreams; but I think both images of transport–plane and train–signify my journey in life.  Just hoping and praying that I am traveling in the right direction.

We will be there

No sound of thunder

Will deafen our ear

No fury of wind

Will bend our will.

From the fires of the earth

We will not falter

To the motions down under

We will not quiver.

Be it from High Above

Or brought by men of might

Devoid of heart for humanity

We will deliver.

To serve the affected,

The frail and vulnerable,

In hinterlands and far seas,

To where our hands can reach.

Amidst the clouds of dark

We will see the light.

We will conquer.

We will win

Seizing opportunity in

Every adversity

All for His glory.

Some things you wait for
but don’t come.
Just when the weather bureau announces
that the lady storm will be this year’s
queen of winds and waves to embattle
the sun and seas,
she doesn’t come.

The moment comes when least
expected, but she won’t
even if you wait til eternity…
Instincts really rule us.

Lessons learned: back up all you can (redundancy is key), don’t store laptops, gadgets, or any important stuff all in one place, don’t put the computer back-up files inside the computer bag.

This is the best time to own a new hot laptop. Good thing Torrent is here so I can start re-building my music library. And pictures I will from now on upload to the Net.

Whew! My mind is still cluttered. It’ll take time for me to survive this tragedy. Next practical thing to do: fix the door and buy another lock.

I vow from now on to resurrect my blog. To give updates on my exciting career, to awaken my literary sensitivity, and to document the preparations for my Hon and I’s biggest day

THE INNER DISASTER

“Only after disaster can we be resurrected.”

                                                  – Tyler Durden (Brad Pitt) in Fight Club, 1999

We need to feel the pain first,

go through a life-changing experience first,

for us to feel alive again. 

Our existence as humans is marked by suffering: 

disease, old age, death. 

These are all terminal things

that we cannot prevent. 

While we’re made to believe

that diseases are preventable,

such is not the case: 

a disease will get you in your most vigilant moment—

just when you were sleeping,

you fall asleep, and you wake up

a different person and suddenly

you have cancer in your soul. 

In a race against time, you will grow old

and the longer you stay on earth

the more bitter your experience becomes. 

Death will be the final arbiter. 

No matter how you evade Him

He will meet you

in your most desperate hour. 

After you meet, disaster will have been realized. 

Ahh, such is the feeling of being alive again!